Dream or Lesson?

I just woke up from a dream and it seems I'm supposed to remember this one. I was sitting somewhere like a porch of a country store or a bus station, talking to two guys. They were young and sort of dream like in their conversation. The one I was most attracted to, Ted, was telling me he bet on hoops (or something like that) and he was drinking a beer and I just liked his way and his smile but for some reason the conversation ended, maybe I had to catch the train or the bus or I just had to be somewhere.

So, as dreams go, I was next at a hospital where the previous director of nursing was there with her daughter who was caring for her as she was supposedly a dottering old woman but actually although she didn't keep very good balance, she was agile and wise and fun. There was a funeral for someone in the community and everyone was so ebulliant about this person I was sorry I never met him or her (can't remember). I know I was going to have an interview at this hospital the next day at 0800 but I realized I just had to find go back and find Ted (the guy I met w/his friend) so I went on my quest.

I got to his house where he lived with his parents and 4 other little kids who delighted in showing me their flying animal toys that attacked you ... but didn't really hurt. His mother was delightful and invited me to play tennis. I kept leaving my pocketbook unattended but I wasn't fearful that someone would take it for some reason. Next I remember going to Ted's friend's house to see if he was there but only the guy's mother was home (although I didn't know because I just walked in and started wandering around) and I used some of her beauty products. Next I remember a huge wedding was occurring at this house and all the particpants were sitting around individual tables during the reception looking at gems and jewelry for sale.

I decided I better get back to my quest to find Ted and left, leaving my pocketbook behind. As I approached Ted's house again, I saw him and he had the most perfect smile when he finally recognized it was me and I was looking for him. We went into his house and even tho' I knew I was blowing off the job interview and had no prospects for the future, I knew I was doing the right thing for me. His parents, altho' disappointed in their drifter son, loved him and so by association, loved me immediately. His dad took me on a tour of the area and when we got back to the house, we passed Ted with a wheeled wagon filled with his most prized possessions including a musical instrument, a huge dog and some other stuff coming down the road to meet me. I suddenly realized I forgot my pocketbook but soon some good samaritan brought it to me and nothing was missing.

I woke up feeling like I had been in a cool, fun indie movie that teaches us there are some people we are just attracted to and it is right to follow that instinct rather than take the safe course because we will see and learn and enjoy along the way. :)

Winter again, yuck!

You'd never know I was one of those perpetually happy people that goes around saying "the weather is the weather, you can't do anything about it" when others complain of rain, snow, heat or cold. When it gets to be this time of year, ugh, I get sluggy and unmotivated. I forced myself to go to tai chi last night even tho' all I wanted to do was snuggle up at home and read my book. SO, what do I do when I feel this way? Just what I did last night, I FORCE myself to move, to create, to think action. It usually works well and I get out of the funk for at least a little bit.

So, today I am forcing myself to write, then I will force myself to get upstairs and finish binding my quilt, finish the placemats I started and make the table runner that will compliment those placemats. This afternoon I will force myself to go to the free brown bag concert at beautiful Mechanics Hall with George and tonight I will force myself to go to the African drumming class at the African Art Museum in Clinton with G as well. We attended their anniversary celebration last week and it was a delightful evening spent viewing the art, listening to the amazing music and sampling the delicious food. I know I will enjoy all of these things once I force myself to step out the door.

It's going to be a long winter when I feel this way already in November without a warm sunny climate vacation in sight - well, not until the girls week in Florida but that's not until far away April :-(.

So, I just have to keep reminding myself I CAN do this, I CAN get through it ... and keep dreaming of Spring and planting and sunshine. I will NOT let this get me down even tho' I keep seeing those dark and shortened months in my head looming ahead like an obstacle to be tackled. I try not to wish away the time but it seems the only way to get through it ... wishing for the best time of year ... oh well, positive thoughts.